Three Simple Rules

We all have rules we live by. A rule is a regulation or a principle that governs conduct or behavior. There are specific rules to every sport or game. In baseball, three strikes and you are out. There are rules that govern driving. We all know that the rule is to stop at a stop sign. In All the Little Live Things, Wallace Stegner says,  says, “It is the beginning of wisdom when you recognize that the best you can do is choose which rules you want to live by, and it’s persistent and aggravated imbecility to pretend you can live without any.” Rules are a necessary part of life. They help us to feel safe. We know what to expect in a given situation based upon the accepted rules of the society or group.

I encourage everyone to follow three simple rules. Even though they are simple, sometimes they are hard to follow. When you break any one of these three rules, you suffer. You punish yourself. You are the authority who enforces the rules. You are the one who understands the rules of conduct for any activity in your life. You know the rules you follow when there is nobody watching. Author Robert Heinlein says, “I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them too obnoxious, I break them. I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do.”

It’s a good idea to reconsider the rules you’ve been following. You may find that some of the rules are nothing more than old habits. You may want to consider adding some new rules to your life.  If no one has taught you any of these rules, or if someone has taught you a different rule that isn’t working for you; you may want to consider adopting my three simple rules. I know that you would benefit, so please give them a try.

2. Accept Yourself. Accepting yourself as you are right now is empowering. Accepting yourself allows a sense of value and worth regardless of your size, age, weight or level of fitness; regardless of your job, your status, your level of education, your wealth. Accepting yourself allows you to celebrate the glorious and unique being that you are. It also allows you to be more accepting and tolerant of others.

3. Pleasure Yourself. Pleasuring yourself is an instinctive act. As human beings, our lives are based on a pain/pleasure reward system. We are programmed to seek out physical, sensual pleasure; whether through food, sunshine or sex, dancing, singing, and laughing. The more we experience pleasure, the more pleasure we can experience. Each time we experience pleasure, we literally create neural pathways which induce the pleasure response throughout our bodies. As we experience pleasure, within our brain we “click” our amygdala forward to the frontal lobes, which results in and reinforces more creative and imaginative thinking. Pleasure also produces the hormonal release of endorphins, creating a healthier body and a sense of well being.Following the rules can make your body, mind and spirit feel good. Each one of us must embrace the secret, private pleasures that feed our souls and enrich our lives. We must love ourselves enough to accept what gives us pleasure and actively seek it out. It’s simple.