Are you guilty of overcommitment? Do you commit to doing something and then never do it? Maybe it’s a simple thing like telling someone you’ll call them back. And then you get busy with your other commitments and you fail to do it. Or it could be committing to do something good for yourself like daily exercise or meditation. And then you realize that you don’t have the time because you’ve committed yourself to do other things. You’ve failed yourself.
It might not seem like a big deal, but when we repeatedly act in a certain way, little things make a big impact. This is the case whether it is a positive or a negative impact. When you don’t follow through on your commitments, you’re sending a message to yourself and to the Universe. You are programming your subconscious mind to accept your lack of follow through. You are telling yourself that you can’t be believed; that you can’t trust yourself. You are preventing yourself from achieving your goals. Your behavior also sends a message to others. You are programming others not to believe you.
Every action is a choice. Non-action is also a choice. You can choose to only make the commitments you are willing to honor. Sammy Davis Jr. said, “You always have two choices: your commitment versus your fear.” You don’t have to agree to do everything. You can tell your friend “no” rather than saying “yes” and then not showing up. Remember, “no” is a complete sentence. There is nothing else required.
When you do agree to honor your commitments, you will find great power in that. Your word means something. Your word has authority. Stuart Wilde reminds us that, “It’s important to establish your word as law unto yourself and others, because that in itself becomes an affirmation of your ever-developing authority over ego.” When your thoughts and deeds are in alignment with your best life, you are creating a vibration of success. You become a dream master who is in control of creating your life.
Before you say “yes”, consider if you will commit to the follow through. Consider what saying “yes” means. Can you do it? Can you afford the time? Is it at a time of day that is convenient to you? What are the conflicts? What is the priority? Does this matter to you? Are you committing to things/people/events because you think you should do it or because you want to do it? When you are saying “yes” and feeling “no”, you are not doing anyone any favors, especially you. It’s important to learn to say “no”.
When considering commitments, start with yourself. When you honor yourself, it is easier to honor others. Give yourself every benefit to help yourself succeed. Keep things simple. Consider what is on your to-do list. It may be a mile long. There may be items on that list which require a week to complete. Your to-do list may be overwhelming. It may make it difficult for you to feel like a success. So, consider your priority. The number one task you must accomplish. And then do it. Consider your next priority and do that. You may have many items on your list, but you know what is important. Do that and keep doing that. You will feel successful. You will accomplish your goals. You will do it one step at a time. You will do it now.
You may be overwhelmed by a commitment. Maybe you want to lose weight – a lot of weight – as much as 100 pounds. That is a long term commitment. You must wait for the results before you feel success. When you take one step at a time, you can break down your commitment. You can commit to walk 5 miles every day. You can commit to refrain from eating after 8:00 pm. You can succeed at programming yourself to your daily commitment. Each day’s success will lead to achieving your long term goal. By honoring your commitments, you are programming yourself to believe in your ability to change your behavior. One change leads to another. Commitment is the difference between a goal and a wish.
When you have programmed yourself to honor your commitments to yourself, you honor your word. You’re better able to honor the commitments that you make to others. You’re better able to determine when to say “no” and when to say “yes”. You are more aware of your ability to make good things happen and your ability to avoid unpleasant consequences. When you honor and respect yourself, you are more able to honor and respect others.
When you don’t honor your commitments to others, you create an experience of being unreliable. When people think of you as unreliable or untrustworthy, those negative thoughts diminish you. No one believes you. People don’t take you seriously. Your word has no value.
Make the decision now. Honor your commitments. You will develop a sense of power. You will feel that you have control over your life. You will do what you say you will do. And by doing that, you commit to becoming a better version of you.